I turned 26 this year, and I broke my birthday curse. Starting in 2019, a tragedy happened every single year on, or very close to my birthday, and it's made me wary of the day ever since. This year though, I had planned a party to watch Saw III with my friends (we've been doing Saw movie nights: Sawterday). My partner bought a cake for me, and we had an awesome time. The next day, we went to the mall, and I bought this nice hoodie I'd been eyeing for over a year. I don't often spend money on myself, so it was really special to use the birthday money my parents had sent me on something luxurious, rather than just putting it into savings.
I also got really into Our Flag Means Death recently. I've always loved pirates, and my solution to a lack of queer pirate content was running my own pirate RP on discord for a little while. It's really cool that a show finally came along that was exactly what I wanted, and what I need. (And Taika Waititi is there! He's one of my favorite actors and directors of all time.) I've been enjoying talking about it with my friends, and I even made this
sweet fan video. (Do people still call them AMVs?)
On the downside, I've been a bit stressed lately with the existential crisis of late capitalism. Sometimes I have flashes of "Why am I sitting here in this car, commuting again?" and "Am I really sitting at this desk for eight hours?" and "What's the point of this shit?". But then, I remember what the point of survival is when my friends are singing me happy birthday, or when I'm meeting new friends at festivals, or seeing Joan Jett at a free outdoor concert. (She was incredible.)
I know that the solution to that is to volunteer for causes I believe in, and help people. I feel the need to make the world a better place in a way that feels tangible, and real to me. I want to help somebody, somewhere. I was burned out on activism for a while after a lot of hard work, but I want to get back into it. I just have to search for the right community to do it in. I'm wary of burning out again from pushing myself too hard, and I really need good support. Here's to hoping that twenty-six is gonna keep being a good year for me.